The Deaths of Two Important Ladies

In early January I got a text that said that someone very important and influential in my younger life had passed away.

In late January my mom told me that one of her best friends, my "Auntie" had been moved into hospice, and she passed away in February.

I've been/am grieving. I've been really sad.

Both of these incredible women held very important and similar pieces of my heart. They were role models, mentors, support systems, and cheerleaders. And their recent deaths taught me a few things.

Tell People You Love Them

I missed my chance with one of them. Someone said, "I only hope she knows how much she meant to me." 

A whole community has been grieving her loss, and many of us can only hope she knows how much she meant to us all. I hadn't told her in many years. And I'm always going to regret that.

So when my Auntie was moved to hospice I made sure to go as soon as I could. We had tea and cookies (I have often been the volunteer and not the recipient of these kinds of services. Having a volunteer wheel in fine china and handmade cookies meant so much to me, my mom, my sister and my auntie right then. Thank you.) And I told her I loved her. I love her. My sister and I got to tell her she taught us how to be a thoughtful auntie and share where we were in our lives and tell her we love her.

When you have the chance, take it.

Live your best life + love it hard

I’m just lying here, thinking of what a wonderful life it’s been
— auntie

what a perfect and beautiful and inspiring thing to say.

Life's joys, the ones that you lie there thinking of, they are simple. They are love. They are nieces and friends and family and flowers and tea and cookies and prayer blankets and candy vaults and all the million moments that make up your heart and your life.

What a wonderful life I'm so lucky to have.

and have been so lucky to have these two women be part of it.


It's just love.

I told someone that I was filled with regret for missing my chance to tell her how much she meant to me. The thing that helped the most that they told me was: 

The only people who are sad, or hurt, or angry are the ones that are left behind. The ones who are gone - they are just surrounded by love now. They're not holding ill will against you for not telling them often enough that you loved them. They're just love.

but still, take the chance when you have it.


I love you both.

Always will.